LyleTV proudly presents:  The Dog Whisperer!

Welcome to the show where I take on the dogs no one else can manage.  I rehabilitate dogs.  I train people.  I am the Dog Whisperer.

I have been called to visit a Kentucky family with a so-called "crazy dog."  Hello, Kentucky family.

Boss man:  Hi, Lyle.

Tell me about  your "crazy dog."

BMn:  Can you narrow down that search for me a little?

Har de har.  Tell me about Spring.

BMn:  Well, she really hates her crate.  She goes a little nuts when she has to go in there, unless it's bedtime.

Hm.  Very interesting.  Go on.

BMn:  She also barks a lot when the doorbell rings, but she's really not the only one with that problem, Lyle.

It sounds to me like you have an unbalanced dog.

BMn:  I can't argue with that.

What she needs is to be guided by calm, assertive energy.  Let's go meet her, and I'll show you how it works.   Hi, Spring.

Spring:  Hey, Lyle.

I hear you have been getting your crazy on again, Stinky Dink.

Spr:  Don't call me that.

Hokeydokey, Dinky Dog.

Spr:  You're making me angry.  You won't like me when I'm angry.

I don't like you when you're not angry.

Spr:  I warned you!!

Holy rollers, Boss Man!  You've got a live one there.  Now stand back and watch me do my Dog Whispering magic.  Psst!  Hey, Spring!  Psst!  You are CRAZY!

BMn:  I don't think that's helping.

The first step in rehabilitation is recognizing the problem, Boss Man.

BMn:  Uh, Lyle, I'm pretty sure that's a different kind of rehabilitation.

Mmmhmm.  Let's start with the basics here.  First we must master the walk.  Boss Man, walk this way.  Put a little swing in it, will you?

BMn:  I really don't see how this is supposed to help Spring.

Who? Oh, her?  She's nuts.  Nothing I can do about that.  But I really would enjoy a nice walk and then maybe a snack.  Whaddya say, Boss Man?

BMn:  *sigh*

Exercise, snacks, affection.  That's what it's all about.  Thanks for joining us today.  Keep it tuned to LyleTv...don't touch that dial!