Itchy season has begun. It is the second bad thing about Washington. The itchy season is terrible here. I am on a whole bunch of no-itchy pills and goop and I hate it all.

I have always pledged to be a drug-free Whigle, so I spit out all the pills I can. But the bosses are crafty. They hide pills in cheese. Mmm...cheese. But not the store brand. I will only eat pills hidden in name-brand cheese. They hide pills in liverwurst. What kind of dog can resist liverwurst? Not this one.

It is so hard to set a good example. At this rate I will never pass the drug tests for the next Olympics.