Today on LyleTV:  Body by Lyle!

All of us here at Body by Lyle are committed to giving YOU the viewer the body you've always wanted:  mine!  Now I know not every dog can look as handsome as me, but that doesn't mean you shouldn't try. 

Today I have a very special guest, who is almost as handsome as me.  Welcome, Izzie!

Izzie:  Thanks for having me on the show.

Tell us, Izzie, what is your secret to your good looks?

Iz:  Naps, Lyle.  It all comes from a good nap.

Really?  Tell us more.  What makes for a really good nap?

Iz:  Now, this is important.  Any sleep is good sleep. Sleeping is always better than not sleeping!

I couldn't agree more. 

Iz:  Recently I've learned that some of my furred comrades are not allowed on furniture at all. Are you aware of this? I think we should start protesting - a grass roots movement of sorts. Imagine, going your whole life, never knowing the feeling of a nice microsuede couch under your belly, a comfy pillow under your head? It is heartbreaking.

It really is.  Of course protesting is a lot of work.  Work tends to make me sleepy.  Lucky for me I'm allowed on the furniture.  You know, Izzie, sometimes I have a really hard time picking out my favorite couch.  How do you choose?

Iz:  First, you must make sure you find the comfiest furniture in the house! Although I love my orange chair, I have found our new couch is pretty comfy too. I mean it is no orange chair, but it makes for some good sleeping - so don't commit to quickly to one piece of furniture. Lay on all furniture in the house. Weigh your options. Lay in different positions. Lay during different times of the day. Lay through different seasons.

That's good advice.  What if someone else likes the comfy couch?  What do I do?

Iz:  After you've decided which piece of furniture is your favorite, you need to claim it! Although you may be tempted to mark the furniture, don't do that. Furless ones generally frown on indoor peeing. However, you need to be on that chair as often as you can. When the furless ones aren't home, you better believe you oughta be sleeping on it. And really, you should sleep on it when they are there too. It really helps if you look adorable when sleeping on it as well.

I'm good at adorable.

Iz:  Also, if you can share your furniture with a family furless one, I most definitely recommend that you do. Tall and I have spent some quality time on the orange chair. He's good for head pets, plus, he's warm and he's very skinny. He takes up very little of my chair, so I allow him to enjoy it with me.  Now, of course, there are going to be some problems when your sibling dog or non-related furless want to sit on the chair. This is where things get a bit sticky.

We'll be right back with Izzie's tips when we return from our nap!

Well, I don't know about you, Izzie, but I feel a whole lot better.  I could use a snack, though.  Care for an egg?  You were telling us how to deal with siblings or furless who want to sit on our comfy chairs. 

Iz (yawning and stretching):  That's right, Lyle, I was.  This is my advice.  If you are dealing with a sibling dog - and I know many of you have sibling dogs out there - and that dog is in YOUR chair, I'd recommend taking a toy that said dog loves, and shaking said toy right in front of the dog's face. I generally find that works quite well in removing said sibling dog. If that doesn't work, well, then you've got to resort to annoyance. Crying is acceptable, as is barking and pawing of the sibling dog while said dog is on the chair. It might take a while, but with enough dedication, you will get that darn Cricket off of your chair! 

What about sharing with other furless?  That has to be tough.

Iz:  That can be a bit touchy. For some reason, even though Tall and Squat tell the visiting furless ones that I love my chair, they sit on it anyway. I am willing to share my chair with one furless, if I get to know them pretty well, but sometimes, TWO furlesses cozy into my chair. This leaves no room for me. When this happens, I stare at them. I cry. I stare. I whimper. I cry. I stare. And finally, when I cannot take anymore, I physically try to remove them from my chair by digging at them and by trying to wiggle myself in the chair with them. Your furless ones will probably act a bit embarassed. But it is a show...at this point, they know you've got dibs on the chair and that the chair using interlopers are just no good.

Those are good moves, Izzie.  I know all my viewers have learned a lot today.  One more thing before our time is up...I'd love to know what you would consider to be the absolute perfect nap.

Iz:  My perfect nap. Hmmm. Every nap is perfect, really. But I'd have to say that my favorite nap in the whole entire world is the post-dog-park-ran-around-a-bunch-then-drank-a-bunch-of-water-and-stretched-out-to-take-up-the-whole-darn-orange-chair kind of nap.

Something for us all to dream about.  Sweet dreams, everyone!