♫Here in my car♫
♫I feel safest of all♫
♫I can lock all my doors♫
♫It's the only way to live♫
♫In cars♫

Some dogs like to ride in the car.

Not me.

I do like some of the places that the car goes.  Like Dairy Queen.  And Grandpa Bob's House of Chicken and Cake.  But I don't like getting there. 

This is because the bosses never let me drive.  I don't even get a seat in the front.  I am all by my lonesome in the back seat.  It seems unfair to me, when Little Bit gets to sit on a pillow on the boss ma'am's lap.  I say, "I want to sit up front!"  Little Bit says she called shotgun before I was even born.  Hmph.

So I have to entertain myself.  Sometimes I sing.  The bosses say, "Hush, Lyle," and "That's enough, Lyle."  But I have a lovely singing voice, so I keep singing.

Sometimes I talk to the people.  The bosses say, "Lyle, be quiet!  My eardrums are exploding!" I have no idea why they say this.  But they keep interrupting me so eventually I give up trying to talk to the other people and I try to take a nap. 

I need to work on a thingamabob for teleportation.  If I invent it, then they have to let me drive it.  And honk the horn all I want.

It can't be much different from a time machine, right?